Beginning Goal Setting
Hello everyone – I hope you found last week’s “finding clarity” theme informative and that you will find this week’s information informative too. If you missed last week it is still up on IGTV here. Our topic for this week is all about goals and how to move them from New Years resolution failure to something that serves us well in our lives.
For sure we know from research that those who are successful at making things happen actually write their goals down. You may notice that even if you are not a goal writer normally, that when you have a household chore that must be done or you are having company that you write a list to make it happen. There is so much more at stake when you are looking at your life and living it as if it were precious and you loved it. It is about how we will feel about how our lives mattered or did not matter in the end.
Begin by looking at your purpose as you know it now and your why again. Don’t get discouraged if you are still unclear about your purposes, you are building a foundation that will help you get there. You know enough now to begin. Look at the areas of your life where you need to move into becoming your purpose. These are YOUR areas of importance, not necessarily the standard ones such as health, career, financial, family or intimate relationships, social relationships, the spiritual part of you, your emotional life etc. For instance, one of the areas of my life is my environment, an area that is not normally on the wheel of life. Order and beauty is important to my well being, from my car to my office, to my home, to my patio and plants. Order and beauty leaves me free to create in my business and the joy of beauty in my environment gives me positive energy to do what I need to do. When we are choosing our goals, keep in mind that they need to be in alignment with you and your life purpose and they need to move you increasingly towards your fuller purposes. Part of the challenge of making a goal that only looks at the endpoint without looking at the journey means that we have a hard time with the journey, and we don’t approach it with ease and celebration. Here is my story of the day that helps to illustrate this.
One day a master was watching a practice session in the courtyard. All the students were doing their practices.
Among all those students he noticed that there was one young man who was trying to perfect his technique but he was not able to work on the move he was working on properly and it seemed to the master that young man was getting disturbed and distracted by the presence of the other students. The master could sense the young man’s frustration and went up to young man and tapped on his shoulder.
He questioned the young man, “What’s bothering you?”
The Young man replied with a strained expression, “I don’t know..I don’t understand why i am not able to execute this move properly. No matter how much i try.” The Master replied, “Listen, before you can master a technique, you should understand harmony. Come with me and I will explain to you how you can do that.”
The Master and the student left The building and walked some distance away into a forest until they reached a stream. After arriving there, the master and the student stood silently on the bank of stream for some time.
After a while the master spoke to young man pointing at the stream, “Look at the stream. See that there are rocks in its way, does it slam them out of frustration??”
“No. It will not slam those rocks but instead the stream will simply flow around them and move on. Be like the water and you will know what harmony is..”
The Young man understood the master’s advice and went back to the courtyard to practice his moves and this time, he concentrated his focus on his moves and barely noticed the other students around him and the other distractions in his life and soon he was able to execute the perfect move and master the technique .
If we want to achieve our goals then we must try to get in harmony with ourselves and our outside world and yet not let the presence of outside influences distract us and keep us from our goal.
So what might be a helpful process for you to make your goals?
1. Find a time to be quiet and look at the categories of your life – I mean health, finances, social etc.
2. Write out a large list of goals, those that you want to do and those that might really make a difference for that category of your life, bringing you balance and happiness.
3. Choose 3 goals to be committed to over the next 3 months (part of the reason – there are many reasons but this is a big one- that New Years goals don’t work because they are yearly goals – too long to sustain the vision. Your goals are only going to be 3 months.) When you are doing this – keep in mind your 3 words that are important for you to live each day.
4. Write your 3 goals down along with the date you will have completed it. For example: I will have my subscription program running by the second Tuesday of November.
5. Write out 5 things that need to be done in order to make each of your 3 goals happen. For example the subscription goal above: 1. I will send a letter to my followers letting them know it is happening and when. 2. I will do 9 IGTV appearances in the month before the subscription program begins. 3. I will put the bonus together for those that choose to subscribe. 4. I will choose 3 beginning titles for the subscription. 5. I will put together the first subscription. And for this goal I have a 6th to do. I will put out facebook ads 2 weeks before.
You have begun. You need some time to do this. There is a new give away this week to help you to set goals. Please access it on the site.
A last little warning. In my story at the beginning we looked at being in harmony with our outside world, like water that smoothly goes around the rocks on its way to its destiny. There is also an inner part of us that needs to be attended to. When setting goals, particularly for women, we need to be aware that we live in a male dominated culture. Our goals need to be a reflection of who we are. The shape of each of us is very unique. When we try to mold ourselves into someone else’s idea of us, we betray our very soul. To live fully is to live in harmony and celebration of who we are. In our current culture, we rarely take the solitude to find our dream. We fill every moment and rarely come to know who we are. This quest we have – to become clear about our purposes takes solitude. One of my many favourite writers is John O’Donahue. This blessing is from his book, Anam Cara, A Book of Celtic Wisdom. I leave it for you today. It is titled ‘A Blessing of Solitude’.
May you recognize in your life the presence, power and light of your soul.
May you realize that you are never alone, that your soul in its brightness and belonging connects you intimately with the rhythm of the universe.
May you have respect for your own individuality and difference.
May you realize that the shape of your soul is unique, that you have a special destiny here, that behind the facade of your life there is something beautiful, good and eternal happening.
May you learn to see yourself with the same delight, pride and expectation with which God sees you in every moment.
Go forth and Be Wonderful.